If there’s was a central theme to Jay’s Magna Carta… album it was probably, “Man, being famous is hard” followed closely by “Money, tho…” I believe him on this first count. Being constantly in the public eye, always under scrutiny and pressure from fans. It must get exhausting. Maybe that’s to blame for when celebrities do bizarre things that make normal people like me scratch their heads in wonder. Atlanta’s B.o.B is the most recent figure to join this club, after last night when he went full Terrence Howard and tried to convince people the world is actually flat.
No, for real
Yep, last night B.o.B joined Aristotle and the 14th century Catholic Church in the grand intellectual tradition of refusing to believe that we live on a spherical planet. In a lengthy Twitter rant, spread over several hours, Bobby Ray argued that we are all sheep who just believe everything we read about the earth being round, and gravity and whatnot. His proof? Photos of the horizon in which the earth looks pretty goddamn flat, and a cryptic personal story about being in an airplane and seeing the red bull guy jump off that satellite.
Oh. Well then.
Now, I’ve been down with B.o.B since “I’ll Be In The Sky” but I’ve kinda lost track of him in the last couple years. Judging by his recent mixtape cover though, he has gotten into some pretty out there shit.
What’s weirder though is that when I did a little digging, I found that it isn’t just our man from Decatur who believes this. There are a small but fervent minority of people out there who subscribe to a theory that there is a global conspiracy out there perpetrated by NASA and the Freemasons to prevent The People from realizing that the earth is indeed the flat center of our universe. Because at this point Freemasons are basically a requirement for every conspiracy theory.
So thank you B.o.B for providing me with a glimpse into this fascinating world. I gotta deduct 5 points though, just for the ridiculousness of the whole thing. Maybe you’re trying to make some kind of point about the media or education or something, but if you were, it went over my head around the point where you accused nasa of doctoring photos of earth to appear round.
I’m an open minded person though, so I’ll leave you with this: if you wanna split the cost of a yacht and go on an expedition to find the edge of the world, I am your guy. Just give me time to fire up a Kickstarter page.
